Just Under The Wire

Well, it's 11:02 PM on New Year's Eve. I guess it's time for a resolution.

I've never been good at keeping those things. At least, I wasn't till last years resolution. I said that I would quit smoking and I quit nearly two months ago. So, yea! I think I will have many resolutions this year.

1) I will be a more patient mother.

2) I will continue to be a non-smoker.

3) I will save no less than $50 a week.

4) I will own a new truck by the end of the year.

5) I will finally tone that damn mid-section and have a vicious six-pack.

6) I will take the family on a vacation to Colorado.

I am fairly certain that I will keep at least three of these. The other three will be tough to pull off. I'll let you wonder which is which.

Well, I think this post is about as lame as it's going to get, so theoretically it can only get better. Too bad I'm ready to get off the computer now, huh?

(by the way, some chick on MTV just dropped the F-bomb. She is so fired.)

Nothing Like Returning To A Full Inbox

Remind me to never leave town again. Or, rather, maybe I just shouldn't ever be disconnected from the internet like that again. It's going to take me three weeks just to catch up on all my blog reading! How on earth did any of you have time to post during the holidays? Oh, well. I look forward to each and every one I will be reading. My inbox at work is overflowing, my suitcases are still waiting to be unpacked, and I'm exhausted. But, oh well. It's been a great week. I hope everyone had a great holiday and I'll be back to post soon!

Officially The Longest Post EVER, or, A Vacation!

I felt like a princess all weekend. The company Christmas party was this weekend in Biloxi at the Beau Rivage, and me and my honey went all out.

My hair made me happy. It felt very Rapunzel-esque and glamorous. I spent an hour at the hairdresser being pulled by combs and prodded by over thirtyfrigginfive pins, but it was totally worth it. Men, you see what we go through to look fantastic for you, yes?

Oh, and by the way? That's all my hair, thankyouVERYmuch. Who started this extension craze, huh? Back in my day, if you wanted long hair, by God, you had to grow it your dang self! I've spent the last four or five years getting my hair that long...anyway!

So, the party was wonderful. There was dinner, dancing, over two or three hundred guests, and just an all around good time.

The Beau Rivage is such a FABULOUS resort AND casino! We played the slots and had tons of fun with a few rounds of Black Jack. It's always nice when you're not playing to win, because we sure as heck didn't. Ha! But, it was such a great night and SO much fun I can't even describe. Did I mention that I felt like a princess? Right down to the shoes.

My dress was sparkly and the shoes were, too. Funny think about those shoes. We had just driven north about an hour to drop the kids and doggie off with some friends charitable, magnanimous angels who are friends of ours. So, we dropped off the kids et. al., got that rush of excitement and hit the road to begin our four-and-some-change-hour drive...

Me: *squeals* Ooh, we're on our way!

Honey: I know! I'm so excited, it's gonna be so great.

Half an hour later...

My heart literally nearly stopped, eyes flew open wide, and I couldn't breathe. Honey looked at me with concern.

Him: What's wrong?!?

Me: I. think. I. forgot. some...th-th-thing.

I was trying hard to catch my breath and not actually die in the car from shock because I was pretty f-ing positive I forgot my shoes. The shoes that I had to go to three different department stores to find because OF COURSE the department store that sold me the dress didn't have ANYTHING that matched the dress. The dress that was charcoal gray and was just the right size and just the right amount of glittery and swingy and that I loved and wasn't taking back. Oh, yeah. We were already an hour and a half into our drive by that time and was I really, REALLY prepared to go back? WHO does this happen to? Me, that's who. I think the world imploded and time slowed down in these few seconds while the realization hit home.

I told him and waited for the reaction. My honey love looked right at me, put his hand over mine and gave me a grim smile and said, "Well, we'll just have to be fashionably late, won't we, baby? You have to have your shoes." I loved him a whole lot in that moment and felt better. While I was still reeling over how ridiculous the situation was and how awful I felt for causing it, having him be so charming and sweet about it really helped.

We did go back. We got the shoes and took a different route to get out of the area to the interstate and all in all, we only lost forty-five minutes doing it. We ended up talking and laughing the whole way over to Biloxi and had fifteen minutes to get dressed for the party after checking in. Whew! Good thing my hair was done before we left home.

Ok, so my story has gotten a little out of order.

Like I said, the party was fantastic. I got to meet tons of people that I work and deal with directly through email and phone calls each day. That was so nice. I consider some of these people to be good friends, based on the fact that I've known them for well over a year, nevermind that I'd never actually seen them. It was really great and there were many hugs and smiles all around.

We ducked out of the party a little early to hit the casino and then called it a night at about two or three in the morning. I can't remember the last time I did that, but there's a reason it doesn't happen often.

Our room was exquisite. The bed was so soft I didn't move all night. When we woke up the next day, we ordered room service. Now, I don't know about you, but I'm just a sheltered, poor little ol' country girl. I've never HAD room service. I was speechless. They wheeled in this enormous table that held a veritable FEAST upon it. I had ordered the blueberry pancakes with warm blueberry compote, whipped cream and syrup. He had the Beau Breakfast, which included standards of eggs, silver-dollar pancakes, bacon, hashbrowns, and the like. I officially want to be rich just so I can be served like that every day. I didn't even have to get out of the bed! And my hair still looked fantastic, even after sleeping on it, because of the ten pounds of hairspray that was applied to it.

After much lounging and canoodling, we decided it was time to hit the road. We'd had our fill of the gambling and the high-life for one weekend.

On our way home, we decided to take the scenic route since we were in no hurry to get back. Our friends were keeping the kids (and dog!) for the remainder of the weekend and we had nothing but time. From Biloxi, we took the interstate to Mobile, Al, then headed south. Got stuck at a railroad crossing for about twenty minutes. I haven't missed that about Alabama.

On the road again, we continued south...

...till we could go south no more and arrived at...

I just love driving along this part of our coast. There are so many little barrier islands like this, with their adorable little pastel houses, and long bridges over the water, and miles of beautiful undisturbed beaches.

We went all the way to the end of the island, as far as we could go, when we found a bird sanctuary. So, naturally, we had to go exploring...

We didn't see any copperheads (water moccasins) or alligators, but there were plenty of posted signs to warn us of such, and we even found a hole that we were positive could be big enough for a gator to curl up in.

So, after that, we took the ferry off the island to Orange Beach, Al. I've never been on a ferry before, that was interesting. Sitting in the car that's not moving, but looking out over the edge of the boat and knowing that you are moving. If I was weak of stomach this might actually make me sick, but it was just an unusual feeling.

We got out and walked around; there was only one other car on the ferry. They had a doggie with them and that made us a bit homesick for our little scruffums (read: dog, large) as well as the kids.

Once we came off the boat, we went and had lunch at one of those little seafood restaurants that dot the beaches. The food was excellent and the company was even better. We drove on for a bit, but we were kind of worn out from all the activity and new places and just stuff, that we decided to make it to Pensacola Beach and just chill for the night. Which we did.

We watched movies and talked and slept. Woke up the next day and headed home to get the kids and doggie. What a fun trip.

No, Really. It's Overrated.

Apparently, this is what I am*. But...didn't I kinda point that out in the title of this blog? Yeah, that's what I thought. Told ya so.




*You know it's rigged, right?

NaBloOhCrap

I tried so hard. 15 posts for November really isn't that great; I could have sworn I did better than that. But, it's leaps and bounds more than I had been doing in the past, so I guess that's a good thing. I will try to keep up with it more in the future.

Happy F-ing Holidays

Disclaimer: This post is not, I repeat, NOT for my mother. Mom, don't read it. I know you want to, but just don't. I love you!!


Next week, in honor of Turkey Day, I get one whole day off of work. But, even better than that is the fact that my parents will be taking the kids for four.whole.days.

I cannot tell you how badly a break is needed. Since moving to the Sunshine State, my relief workers relatives are in short supply. I make the annual obligatory treks to the cold, distant North* somewhat reluctantly, even though it does usually afford me some well-deserved alone time.

See, there's always some kind of price I have to pay for visiting my parents and letting them have the kids. Sure, they adore my children with a love that knows no bounds and are happy to keep them on any available opportunity they receive. However. This does not in any way prevent them from giving me the third-degree about any and every aspect of my life for hours on end and then lecturing me about it.

You know, I wish that I could properly convey exactly what it is like dealing with my mother. I'll be sure to write about this in excess after the holiday hullabaloo is over (or maybe even during, if able). Then you'll see. Then you can truly understand the grating, non-stop inquisitions I suffer.

But, let's not speak of such things anymore today. Let's talk about the holidays. Why do we do this? I just don't understand why we've manufactured such elaborate, materialistic events. Christ wasn't born on December 25, that day is a pagan holiday merged with our Lord's birth to trick them into converting.

Thanksgiving was made up by the settlers, because they were just grateful that they survived the winter. As an aside, I actually do appreciate Thanksgiving. I mean, there is nothing wrong with a holiday that is all about being thankful for what you have. But when I see Thanksgiving decorations in the stores and they have obviously commercialized it, I don't know. What's next? Before you know it, they'll have us exchanging gifts on this day as well.

New Year's is just an excuse to get tanked. It's all** just one big excuse to sell crap and party. Decorations, gifts, lights, music...

Take my mom, for example. This woman has no less than 6 or 7 gigantic storage bins*** that are filled to the brim with decorations. For the most part, these decorations are separated according to theme. So, each year, she'll go to the storage unit and peruse her stash until she has determined what this years theme shall be. Yes, it's all Christmas-themed, smarty-pants. But, she's got a whole set of icy-blue decorations. She's got a whole theme of nothing but Christmas plaid decorations. She's got angel themes, she's got snowman themes, she's got reindeer themes. She has corresponding accessories and Christmas music out the wazoo. And she always buys a real tree.

I tell her every year, that although her house looks lovely, it's just not worth it. I try to do as she did when I was a child and remind her that "He's the reason for the season" and all the decorating and present-buying aren't necessary. See, if this woman did the decorating tirelessly, and obviously took great joy in doing it, I would say nothing. Because, truly, it's lovely. But, all I ever hear from the day after Halloween until at least a week after the New Years are complaints, complaints, complaints. "There's not enough time to put up all the decorations." "I don't know which theme to pick this year." "Nobody ever helps me with all this, I have to do it all by myself." "You know, it takes me nearly three days to get the tree all put up and decorated. I have to do it practically all by myself, you know." "I just don't know if I'm going to be able to do it all this year." So, this year, I think I finally convinced her to get a fake tree. That should help, somewhat.

She still insists that all the decorating and such are important for the kids, and I agree somewhat...I mean, I still remember the thrill of this time of year. It used to feel wonderful. I got excited watching Christmas specials on TV, and the commercials were so damn sugary sweet it made me cry. Especially the one for Folgers, where the boy comes in from college or somewhere, and puts on some coffee while everyone's asleep, and the little kid catches him laying out presents or something, and then the mom comes down the stairs and says, "Peter! Oh, Peter! You're home! You're home!" Yeah. Waterworks like clockwork. Those damn commercial makers. I also remember the joys of seeing all the decorations. My mom and I used to drive the neighborhoods at night to look at all the beautifully decorated houses and stores and streets.

But, of course, as a child I assumed that all the shopkeepers and city workers lined the streets and buildings with lights and decorations because they, too, felt the holiday spirit as strongly as I did. Once I realized what a huge crock that was, it kinda lost some of the magic. So, is it important to keep this spirit alive in children, or are you just sugar-coating the world and putting off the inevitable realization that it's all a bunch of marketing tools and commercialization?


*Cold, distant North being Birmingham, all of four and a half measly hours away from me. So, read: Light-jacket cool weather, not-so-far-away city of the South. Meh. Details-shmetails.

**I'm not going to attack Hanukkah. I'm not Jewish, but that's one holiday that actually seems to have somewhat avoided the commercialization and merchandise frenzy. It's actually still about the Lord.

***There could be more. Really. I haven't re-counted in the last couple of years. They seem to multiply like rabbits.

I'm (Not) A Slave 4 U

Oh, man. Have I had a good laugh. I posted that sentence in a rushed moment, never thinking about how it would sound to someone who didn't know what was going on.

Hi, my name is Jules and I am a non-smoker.

That line you read yesterday has become my mantra. I've repeated it no less than five million times, and it works. How could I possibly desire/want/crave a cigarette if the poisonous fumes do not taste good and will kill me? Facing the three truths in that statement makes it virtually impossible for me to actually want one, so the only other reason in the world that I should find a cigarette in my mouth is if it's beyond my control. And guess what? It's not beyond my control because I am not a slave. I was a slave to a terrible addiction until I realized that the only person/thing keeping me a prisoner was myself. And I refuse to willingly BE that person. I have more self-respect than that. And I truly feel that I can control it.

Of course there are "cravings". But, honestly, when I think about it and realise that by "satisfying" that craving I am only facilitating more cravings, it makes no sense to give in. Especially when "giving in" means that I'm inhaling poisonous fumes that do not taste good and will kill me.

Day Two has been easier so far than Day One. Yesterday was miserable. I cried a lot and had massive mood swings. I was scared that I couldn't do it, scared that I could. It was like finally ending an abusive relationship. You know it's the right thing to do, but it's still sad because you have so many memories wrapped up together. Jeez. I am comparing cigarettes to an actual relationship. Hmmm. But, hey. We were together for over 13 years, we had a very tight relationship. There wasn't a time when I wasn't thinking about the next cigarette. Everything that happened in a day was broken into different parts, the separators being the "smoke breaks".

Really, the only real problem that I've had is dealing with my boredom. Before, I would just smoke if I couldn't think of anything else to do. It was a way to pass time. It was something I could do no matter what. Happy, sad, angry, glad, tired, alert, busy, bored, morning, noon and night, all of these would apply for an excuse to smoke one more. Then I realised just how entwined cigarettes were with my life. That's also when I realised that all that other stuff is just life, and I don't need a cigarette to celebrate it or validate it or justify it. And when I'm bored, besides smoking, I was also thinking, usually. Or walking outside. Or something. It wasn't just about the cigarettes. So, now when I get bored, I can still walk outside, or think, or do something.

It's been hard. And it's only Day Two. But, at the same time, it's only as hard as I make it. If I immediately remind myself that the poisonous fumes do not taste good and they will kill me, then I feel better. I know that being a non-smoker is better than being a slave.

Today I Realized...

...the poisonous fumes DO NOT taste good, and they will kill you.

Movie Review: The Princess Bride

I spent yesterday afternoon watching The Princess Bride with my family. I never get tired of that movie. When I was about 9, I watched it religiously 4 or 5 times a day for about a month straight. I may have a few OCD tendancies. Anyway, I could recite that movie from beginning to end flawlessly. It is without a doubt, my favorite movie of all time. So, about a week ago, I bought the DVD. Now I know all these little behind-the-scenes goodies.

Like, did you know that Robyn Wright-Penn (Princess Buttercup) was only 19 when they made that movie?

Or that Cary Elwes (Westley) and Mandy Patinkin (Inigo Montoya) practiced fencing for hours every day, every spare moment, to perfect what has been called the best sword-fight scene of all time? You know, neither of them had stunt-doubles.

One of my favorite scenes is The Battle of Wits. That Wallace Shawn (Vizzini) is hysterical. The best is when he says, "You fell victim to one of the classic blunders! The most famous is never get involved in a land war in Asia, but only slightly less well-known is this: never go in against a Sicilian when death is on the line!" And then he laughs exactly 20 times, and falls over dead. You know, reading over that last line, I realize that it couldn't be that funny if you've never seen the movie. Hmmm...but then again, who hasn't seen that movie?

All in all, it's the best love story/adventure tale of all time. Boys and girls alike can get into it. As "Grandpa" said, "Are you kidding? Fencing, fighting, torture, revenge, giants, monsters, chases, escapes, true love, miracles..."

It doesn't sound too bad. I'll try and stay awake...

The GME's 2006

Oh, I am so excited. Last year, I totallly missed out on participating, but not this time! The Everywhere Man is once again hosting The Great Mix Experiment. You know, I want to write a really great post about this, but UC already did that. And I don't want to sound like I copied her word for word, so go read her post about the GME's 2006.

Then, when you do that, you will be convinced that this is a really neat, great idea.


Everywhere Man: The Great Mix Experiment 2006

What NOT To Write About...

I really don't like it when I wait till the last minute to post each day. I'm always yawning like crazy and grasping for a topic to talk about, any topic, but nothing seems good enough. Or, rather, it's not that it's not good enough, it's that I couldn't possibly expand on it. Does that make sense? Let me elaborate...

Off the wall topics that have nowhere to go:

The only thing I saw in the way of news today was the asinine non-stop reporting on the Britney/K-Fed divorce. The only thing I gleaned from all that non-sense was that I will now only refer to him as Fed-Ex. See? Isn't that a stupid thing to write about? Why do I read this trash?

My boss is still a moron, but the balance has been restored somewhat because we have a new person on the crew who has as much power as The Chucky-poo(p) and this new person is benevolent and kind. This has made a world of difference in my working environment.

We've been out of creamer at the house for the last three days, but my sweet bf still makes coffee every morning. I may be a coffee snob. I have to have French Vanilla Creamer or it's just gross. He thinks it's fine with just milk, blech. I bought creamer at the store tonight, and lo and behold...we're out of coffee. Ironic, don't you think?

I watched the History Channel tonight. The strangest, most fascinating shows come on that channel sometimes.

Ooops. I forgot to tell my boss that the kids are out of school on Friday for Veteran's Day. Great.

Oh, another great thing about the Blogger Beta is the spell check. It's much better now. There's no pop-up window showing misspellings, it's just highlights the incorrect words and when you click on the word, it shows a drop-down-like menu of suggestions. WAY better.

Ok, now that I've rambled my way past nine-thirty, I think I'll call it a day.

The Big Switch

Has anyone switched to the Beta version of Blogger yet? I'd be grateful to hear any feedback. As with anything "Beta", there are probably bugs and kinks to work out. But, so far, everything I've read about it seems good. There are labels that can be applied to posts so that similar topics can be grouped together within the archives, and the thing that really caught my attention is that in Beta your Blogger account is linked with your Google account. And we all know how much I love Google. I think I'm gonna do it. I could always switch back, right? Right? Well, I'll keep my fingers crossed, anyway. I'll update later, after I have a chance to play around with the new setup.

Update: Well, I'm excited! I found out right before I made the switch, that no, you can't switch back. But, I took a deep breath and did it anyway. And I am so glad I did. Now, I can put labels on all my posts. And, the whole dashboard layout is better. I can't wait to see what else they have in store for this new version.

Update 2: Wow. I really like the Beta version better. I changed some colors and font sizes and other such detail. While I still wish I had more power over my template, those pesky line-break problems are now gone, whoo-hoo!!

My Paradise

I've always wanted to live here. I grew up in Birmingham, Alabama. I lived there my whole life. Every single year, sometimes more than once, the whole family would pile up in the car and take a vacation at the beach. I always loved it. Often, while standing there, staring at the waves, I felt such a powerful energy about it, I really can't explain it. It was a breathtaking experience for me as a child, and made me realize just how small I was inside this great big world. I still feel that way when I go down there.



A little over a year ago, right before the Fourth of July, I made my mind up that if I wanted to live here I should just do it. What had I been waiting for all these years? No one was stopping me, but me. So, I did it. I made a few trips down there to establish a residence, I put most of my furniture in storage, took a deep breath, and moved. Oh, it was rough. If I'd taken more time to plan, it could've been easier. I had some money saved, so that made it a little easier at first. But, it took me three months to find a job.



I'll never forget that day. The day I finally got a job, I had gone to no less than 40 (yes, that's four-zero) different establishments. The town I live in is relatively small, but it's a tourist town. So, I went from one end of the beach to the other that day, stopping at restaurants, gas stations, what we call "head shops" or novelty shops, real estate offices, grocery stores, hotels, animal clinics, wave-runner rental booths, specialty stores, and two different marinas. You name it, I probably visited it that day. Of course, most of these places were what I like to call "junk jobs", not a job I would particularly want, but when the money is running out, you'll take anything you can get. And I had gotten desperate. It's not that I hadn't been looking for a job up until then, in fact, far from it. It's just that this town runs in seasons. If you're looking at the wrong time, you just won't find anything. I was looking for work at the tail-end of the tourist season, when businesses were just about to begin the winter lay-offs (i.e. not hiring). Aside from pounding the pavement, I had also faxed my resume to about 15 different businesses. So, long story short, it was a pretty discouraging day.



Late in the afternoon, I was really having to force myself to keep going when I was stopped in traffic by a lady working for a construction site. After she let the traffic move again, I pulled over and asked her if the company she worked for was hiring. "No, I don't think so," she started, "but you know, if you go right down the road there, I think the next jobsite is looking for someone." I quickly thanked her and got back on the road. I was so uplifted, there was a chance! I hurried down the road, found a place to park, and marched right into the construction trailer. I asked if they were hiring and the man I spoke to asked what I was looking for. Don't you hate that question? I always want to respond to that with, "whatever pays the most", but that's obviously no good. So, I told him, "Well, I was told you have a traffic controller position, but I'm qualified to be an office assistant if you have anything like that available." And you know what? They had just let go their Office Manager a few days beforehand, and he hired me on the spot!



I tell you, that day was a true blessing. Down to the last few tightly budgeted dollars, pounding the pavement for roughly seven hours, at the very last place I came to, I came away with a much better than expected job. I truly believe it was a lesson in patience and humility. I've been with this company for over a year now. And even though I detest the Chucky-poo(p) (WoodChuck, Chuckles) with a white-hot fiery, furious passion sometimes, I'll always be grateful to him for hiring me that day. That blessing truly came at a time when I needed it the most and enabled me to continue to live here, in my own personal paradise. Every day I get up and get to drive along the coast, look out at the ocean, and still feel that stirring of excitement that I felt as a child. You can't buy that kind of priceless happiness.

NaNoWriMo and NaBloPoMo...Wait, What Was That?

This is what I'm pledging to do. I can't promise I'll stick to it, but I'm going to give it my best effort. Many thanks to Katrina for giving me the idea.



I'm not going to make any apologies for my long hiatus. In fact, I wasn't even going to mention it, because it sounds so much like any other blogger who just stops writing for awhile. But, I figured that, if nothing else, it would just be a topic that I could write something about. And some people might even be slightly interested in why I haven't been writing. Oh, who am I kidding? It's the same ol', same ol', uninteresting stuff.



Let's see...well, to start off, when I stopped writing I had just broken up with a very bad boyfriend and within a couple of weeks, started seeing someone new. I vented about the jerk, here and here, but then grew very weary of that topic. So I stopped. But since it was still such a prominently disturbing issue in my life, I couldn't think of anything else to write about. Then, after all of that was over, I had found a wonderful man who I quickly fell in love with. And you know how that can be. It's a very consuming thing. We've been inseperable since we started dating and...well, you know. I suppose that I could've written about that, too, but that little critic inside me kept telling me not to tell sappy, run-of-the-mill, oh he's so wonderful kind of stories. I mean I will, eventuallly, but not just yet.



So, now that I've gotten all that out of the way, I'd like to say I'm excited about this upcoming month. I have NO idea what I'm going to write about, but I know that even if it just sucks here and there, it will help me grow and get back in the habit of writing again. I've really missed it. In fact, I will probably post twice today, just to make up for yesterday. Thanks again, Katrina. Happy NaBloPoMo and NaNoWriMo everybody!

What Is UP With The Scary Rabbits?

Aghhhhhhh!!! Run for your lives!! Seriously, people. I seem to be developing a trend towards unusual rabbit images. I need ideas. If anybody wants to send me one of those thingies where I have to answer a bunch of questions, I'd do it. Just for some new material, people...oh my God...where are the rabbits eyes?!?

It's Not Rocket Science, People...Geez

This is one of the most beautiful images our wonderful Hubble Space Telescope has captured recently. These stars, that are all very similar to our own sun, are about 25,000 light-years away in the Milky Way Galaxy. Ok, now that you've had your science lesson for today, kids, you can get back to work!

Well, Today's A Bust

I don't want my blog to be all about links to other places, but I swear, this is worth it. It's strangely interesting. Kinda morbid, but in a fun kind of way. I found this at one of my all-time favorite places to waste time: PointlessSites.com. There's a ton of stuff there for the motivationally-challenged. As a good friend of mine says, "I'm not lazy, I just have an incredible urge to fuck off!"

HAPPY EASTER!!!

Well, it's almost that time again. Time for brand-new Sunday dresses, Easter egg hunts, and more chocolate than you can shake a stick at. Here's a story you might be interested in, but I think the picture speaks for itself:

What do you think about that? Isn't he cute? Makes me want to run out and buy one. Well, maybe not. That would just be crazy, it would be like having a dog, a large, nervous dog with claws. That could hop. I don't know. I'm imagining all kinds of disasters with an animal like that. But he's so cute, you can't help but just love him. Look at those humongous fluffy toes! And those ears! Adorable!

Ok, all joking aside, let's remember the real reason for Easter and give thanks to God. Happy Easter, everybody!

UPDATE: Thanks to Undercover Celebrity for letting me know that the belligerent intellectual posted about the same thing today. What are the odds? Thanks, UC!

On a totally unrelated note: Can anyone tell me why it is that I can't start a new paragraph when I hit "enter"? In the editing box, it looks fine...just like I want it to. But on the actual blog page, it looks like one big run-on thought that just won't quit. You, my hero of blogdom, will have the reward of having your blog linked to many, many times if you can help me with this HUGELY annoying problem.

Oh, I Don't Know

New favorite quotes:
"Friends are the Bacon Bits in the Salad Bowl of Life." And,
"Life is like a roll of toilet paper. The closer it gets to the end, the faster it goes."

Life Covered With Dust

I wonder if I'll ever be a good writer. I'm not a child anymore, so I know that my dreams of being a famous actress or singer are slowly dwindling away to the point of impossibility. But I want to be something like that. I've always wanted to be one of those three things. Mostly, I want to be a musical artist. I've been playing the guitar for close to three years now. Not that that's a long time, cuz it's not, but I'm getting better and better. I think the only things holding me back are my fear of rejection and my choice in men. All the men I've ever dated were so short-sighted. None of them had that "reaching for your dreams" mentality. They all saw my attempts to learn music and my aspirations to be a singer pointless. Or worse, stupid. Even now, my new boyfriend and I just moved in together and you know what? In the month that we've been sharing space, I've picked up my guitar ONCE. And then he asked me, "Would you mind doing that a little later on? I can't hear the T.V." So, I don't do it when he's there. But the only time he's not there is when I'm not there (work). So what's a girl to do? I wish I was at the point in my life where I didn't have to depend on anyone anymore. Will that day ever come? It better. I'm tired of watching my guitar, and my life, collect dust.